Monday, March 1, 2010

Growing apart

Another thing that I also fear in having relationships is that it is not forever. Even married couples for a long time grow apart.

For example, my parents who are both living in Bahrain. In the same house under one roof as husband and wife. But not in the same bed and they are not talking to each other for quite some time now. When I was still in Dubai, one has to call me to relay one's message to the other. I hate it. Not only because I don't have enough balance to call them, but they both know that I'm also busy finding a job at that time. One time I even told my Dad that it's their problem and I have mine too so they should just fix it with themselves. I actually felt sorry after I said that. Maybe I was just feeling a bit pressured at that time.

Until now that I'm back here in the Philippines, they are still not talking to each other. But they still do their responsibilities as husband and wife. Like my Dad would pick up my Mom from work, and my Mom would still do the laundry for the both of them. But that's it. Every Friday (considered as a day off in Middle East) I talk to my Mom via webcam, but without my Dad. He's either in his friend's house or in church. I miss my Dad actually. I haven't seen him via webcam for a long time now.

Even when I was still there in Bahrain, they were already having some problems. My Dad said if it wasn't for me, maybe he would have left my Mom a long time ago. He's been a very good father to me. He makes impossible things happen for the sake of our family. I know, for the past 10 or 12 years of my life, he's been trying to patch things up between the two of them. Before I left Bahrain, he promised me that he will do everything to make their relationship work. But I don't know what will happen now that it's been months since the last time they talked to each other. Everytime I talk to one of them, one will say something bad about the other. It's very difficult to pretend that I'm fine with what's been happening to our family. I'm trying my best to smile and to keep our conversations light, but somehow, deep inside, I am hurting.

I have so many issues in life that I've been trying to fix right now. It's sad that the people who are very dear to me are adding up to my problems.

And I find it weird that for almost 24 years of their marriage, they are still having these misunderstandings. I just hope everything will be fine as soon as possible.



Plus the pressure of my upcoming exam on April (I know, a month early for this) makes me more stressed!

9 comments:

classiquefille said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
classiquefille said...

Oh my.. I didn't know that you have this problem. It shocked me. :(

Dear, you're not alone. I have experienced this already and I am still. Hindi ko lang alam kung nasabi ko sa'yo before. :)

Nalungkot naman ako right after kong mabasa to. All this time, I thought you're family is doing alright.. Hindi pala.

In my case, I've never asked. Pero for sure may reason sila for that. I understand how you feel kasi only child ka tapos ganun. Pero, at least, hindi ka nila pinabayaan. Pede mo silang kainisan pero they have their own reasons.


Hindi sa pinapangunahan ko pero most relationships, once broken, mahirap ng ayusin. :( Sana maayos pa nga nila... Let's pray... And I hope makayanan mo to.. :)

Camille said...

ang hirap din kasi. hindi ko inimagine sa buong buhay ko, magkakaganito pa sila. at ngaun pa talaga. right timing. WOW.

pero salamat. pray lang talaga na maayos din lahat :)

at oo nakwento mo naman sa akin un. pero hindi ko na rin masyado naalala.. hehe

Anonymous said...

di mo naman to nkwnto! puro kasi ung lablife iniisip mo..haha ako pala un..sos ..unahin muna ang importnte! pray pray!! lets pray na maaus nila..=D - plats

Anonymous said...

aww :(
feel sad 4 u gurlfren..
hope that ur prob wont affect ur exam..

jaz keep on praying en everything will b ok :)

elmie said...

oh my, hirap pala ng situation ng parents mo. parang lang silang nasa boarding house, di nag-uusap. it's so sad. :(

Unknown said...

I actually have the same problem bkla, hiskul palang ako problema ko na yan.. sa tinagal tagal ng panahon natutunan ko ng huwag ng problemahin pa, kasi matanda na sila and alam na nila ginagawa nila. kung sa tingin nila na mas at ease at may peace between the 2 of them ng hindi naguusap let them be, huwag mo silang ipressure na mgbati or ayusin.. kc habang pinipilit mo lalong hindi mangyayari believe me. ayokong dumating kapa sa time na mapagod kana at mag give up kc nageeffort ka para mgkaayos sila but they are not doing their part, it's hurting i know coz ive been der and still der.. mas mahaba pa sana ung gsto kong sabihin sa ym na lang ung iba.. just kip it light and pray lang.. :)

canky.is.me said...

we're actually in the same situation. pero i opt not to interfere with their problems. natatakot ako na mafeel nung isa sa knila, na may kinakampihan ako kc alam ko sa sarili ko na mas close ako kay mama. pero naiintindihan ko ung mga issues ni papa kaso hirap rin akong kausapin isya, and ganon rin kay mama.

hay and i think ang mas nagpapahirap ng situation natin eh only child tayo. SHET.

Camille said...

salamat mga friends! :) hindi lang pala ako ang nag-iisang may ganitong problema. hindi lang pala ako ang nahihirapan nang ganito :(

o well, let's just all pray that all of us will be ok. salamat ulit! :)