The sturdy walls

Believe it or not, I started reviewing just a few minutes ago for my oral examinations on the 15th of April. Then I got bored just by scanning my thick (actually my friend's since I borrowed it from her) Medical-Surgical Nursing book. Gahd! Why do we have to take examinations all the time?! Tsk.

So I'll just make a short blog entry about an sms sent to me yesterday by a friend:

They met...

But the timing isn't right..

She has her reasons and he has his..

They're both confused..

So they decided to part ways..

She wants him to wait, he said he will..

Whatever it takes..

Years later, they saw each other again..

..but too much time has passed..

too late to make it work..

Lesson?

People change, so does the heart..

Seize the moment..

For in truth..

Nobody waits forever. :(

----> made me more scared than ever! haha If you are a friend of mine who's been reading this blog for quite some time, you probably read my entry about me having my walls to prevent myself from getting hurt all the time. Mind you, it isn't easy to have those. Most of the time, I feel like I have two persons inside me, telling me to believe and be positive, and the other one telling me the exact opposite. Sometimes, I'd like to lower down my walls just to at least give someone a chance or the benefit of the doubt that maybe, just maybe, he won't hurt me like the previous ones. But since these walls of mine are built after a long time now, they became a bit sturdier than before, that even I could not break it. I'm still dwelling with trust issues, insecurities, and a lot of pressure from my responsibilities that I must accomplish within a short span of time.

I sometimes thought that I hope I never built that walls in the first place. After all, being hurt and scared are all part of loving. It is not always rainbows and butterflies. In order for love to grow and be strong, we should take chances and believe that there is still a happy ending. Because if we continue to be scared of being hurt again, then we'll never be able to love and be loved again.

Then I saw this status message from my friend in facebook:

"The thing is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just have to choose who is worth the pain."

As of now, I'm still in the process of trying to break down my walls. But maybe, taking a shot at this time is worth giving a try. I don't know. We never know what's the best decision anyway unless we try.

Pero natatakot pa rin akong maramdaman ulit ang selos, paranoia, disappointments, and everythAng else na kaakibat ng feeling na ayokong maramdaman sa ngayon!