Bipolar

The heat yesterday was just so insane! Eventhough my electric fan was on all throughout the day, it didn't do any help. I only turn my aircon on for 3 hours during night to save electricity since I'll be needing more money for my trip to Dubai soon.

I don't know if it was just because of the heat, or maybe hormonal imbalance (again), or maybe I was just not in  the good mood yesterday.

Maybe I'll be receiving my authenticated HS credentials next week, already sealed by UAE embassy. I just hope it will be finished as soon as possible.

I want to leave now. I want to go back to Dubai and leave all my problems here behind.

I know this is where I'm good at. Running away and never facing my own dilemmas in life.

Lord please give us some rain. Not like Ondoy but something to relieve us from this intense heat.

PS: I saw this in my friend's FB and somehow, I got affected! Haha. Shet! But I already stopped my "stalking" habit since friendster days. :)

Did this affect you too? Haha!

 

Oh hello, Manila!

I am back. Nung Vday pa. Humabol! hehe

Ika-3rd day ko na ngayon. Ano nang nagawa ko? Puros kaartehan pa lang naman! Hahaha. Pampering myself and bonding with my BFF. :) Pero inaayos ko na rin naman yung mga papeles na kailangan ko. Pumunta nga ko sa school ko kanina na pinag-aralan ko nung elem at highschool. Nagrequest ng TOR at diploma. 1 week ko pa hihintayin. So, that leaves me, 3 weeks? Ipupunta ko pa yun sa Dep ed na covered yung school ko. Bago ipunta sa DFA. At ipunta sa DHL para patatakan nila ng UAE embassy seal. Hindi ko alam kung kaya yan ng 1 month. Sana naman makaya. Kung hindi naman, siguro baka pwedeng ipa-DHL na lang din sa akin if ever makabalik na ako ng Dubai.

Magrereview rin ako. Sana this week, makagawa na ako ng reviewer para pwede ko na lang basa-basahin. Tapos siyempre, I have to allot time to spend time with my friends again. Feeling ko hindi talaga enough yung time para magawa ko lahat ng ito. Pero I have faith naman kay God at sa sarili ko. Kaya ko ito!

Hay, sa dami nito, san pa kita ilalagay sa schedule ko? Sa totoo lang, ginugulo mo lang buhay ko. Pero masaya naman ako na ikaw ang nanggugulo.. :)

Antipatikow

BOSS: You're only 23? So small!

APPLICANT: (thinking: "Duh. Is the word 'young' not included in your dictionary? I'm 5'4 kaya!")

BOSS: You know, we're looking for older than 25. I don't trust young people because they change minds easily. One day they're okay, the next day they're not.

APPLICANT: But it can varies from one person to another, right? *smiles widely*

BOSS: Come here to me...

APPLICANT: (thinking: "Not another maniac on the loose?!") *stood up and went to the boss' table*

BOSS: Type something brief about yourself (on the laptop).

APPLICANT: *typing* (thinking: "Forte ko na ito! Bilis ko kaya magtype. Rank 3 kaya ako sa Typing Maniac sa facebook.")

BOSS: Why are you using only one finger?

APPLICANT: No sir, I'm using two! (forgot the word hands! hahahaha) And sir, I can type fast. See?

After the APPLICANT finished typing a brief description about herself...

BOSS: Why only these? (3 sentences)

APPLICANT: You said to type only a brief description sir. That's brief!

BOSS: Tell me more about yourself.

APPLICANT: Both of my parents are working in Bahrain. My father is an engineer and my mother is an accountant. I'm an only child.

BOSS: Are you sure? Maybe you don't know your father has 7 or 8 other children...

APPLICANT: *smiles* (thinking: "Are you on drugs sir?!!")

BOSS: Are you married?

APPLICANT: No. I'm single.

BOSS: Do you have any children?

APPLICANT: No.

BOSS: Really? Maybe today you're saying that but the next day, you'll say you have 7 or 8 children...

APPLICANT: No sir. I really don't have. (thinking: "Seriously sir, I think you're on drugs!")

BOSS: Do you have a boyfriend?

APPLICANT: No.

BOSS: No? Here you don't have?

APPLICANT: No, sir. I don't have.

BOSS: In the Philippines you don't have?

APPLICANT: I don't have also. (thinking: "Wala nga e ha! Pagdukdukan ba sa aking single nga ako?!")

BOSS: You know the supermarket there? *points at the window* There, you can get a boyfriend. Some are French, Indians, Locals, any nationalities. You can have your pick.

APPLICANT: *still smiles* (thinking: "Sir, if you don't want to accept me or I'm not qualified with the post, then just tell me. I'll gladly accept it. Don't torture me with your nasty attitude.")

BOSS: Ok, I'll give you my number and call me tomorrow if you'd like to come back for an exam. Here's my number....

APPLICANT: Ok sir. I'll just call you tomorrow morning. (thinking: "In your dreams! Kiss my ass!!!")

I really hate it

Take this scenario:

A boy and a girl hanging out for a few months (dining out, watching movies, calling each other, and the likes). As a girl, you feel/know there's something going on between the two of you. But of course you don't want to assume. The boy doesn't tell you anything except for the constant I had a great time with you, I miss you's, and the "pahaging" effects men usually do (C'mon, admit it. 99.9% of the male population does that). So one day, since the girl is really confused about what's the real score of their relationship, she confronted the guy. The guy finally admitted that he likes the girl and wants them to be more than friends (hallelujah!!!). But here's the catch: He wanted to give it a little more time since he's not sure if he's really over with his ex.

The moment I heard this from my friend, I palpitated a bit and started feeling so pissed off. I've been in this situation a lot of times and I know exactly how the girl feels.

Questions/Arguments running into my mind as my friend was telling this scenario to me:

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  Why did the guy started going out with another girl when he's not over with his past relationship?
  
  
  
• 
  
  Why did the girl confronted the guy when she can wait for a little more time for the guy to open-up?
  
  
  
• 
  
  Was the guy just looking for someone to divert his attention? a rebound perhaps?
  
  
  
• 
  
  Why did the girl let herself to actually "fall in love" with the guy who's not sure about his feelings for her?
  
  
  

But after writing this whole scenario again for the introduction of this blog entry, I've realized some things and these are my answers to my queries...

• 
  
  How did I ever ask the first question when in fact, I, myself, have done this to someone a few years back. Yes, I went out with someone to divert my feelings for someone special. I don't have any bad intentions at that time, really. I don't want to use him and take his feelings for granted. My original plan before was to give this other suitor a chance and if everything went well, I can finally ditch my special someone. But, unfortunately, it didn't work out. I broke his heart and wasn't able to mend mine as well. So maybe, the guy's plan here was just to have fun and forget his loneliness which I think is somewhat acceptable (haha!).
  
  
  
• 
  
  For some reasons, men really like the "chase". They really want to keep the guessing game alive, whether the girl already likes him or not. Well, that's what most of my male friends told me. But another boy friend (platonic---hope not! haha) of mine has a different view about this topic. He said, if the guy really likes the girl, and he found out that the girl also likes him, then that's it! He's already in cloud nine. So I say, the boy in this scenario is still confused about his feelings not only for his ex, but also for the girl he's been hanging out with.
  
  
  
• 
  
  Refer to the first answer.
  
  
  
• 
  
  I think it's better if we can get the girl (who is actually involved in the scenario) for her answer about this one.. hehe. But here's what I say. As a girl who's been in this kind of situation before, we really cannot control our feelings towards each other. It is very difficult. No matter how high you put up your walls to guard your emotions, we can't do anything when our heart already made a decision.
  
  
  

So my advice for the girl, READ THIS.

And for the boy...

I actually wanted to tell you a lot of things. But after analyzing the whole situation, I understand that you're also a human and not different from us, girls. I just hope you figure-out your real feelings soon because you might lose them both. Oopps, my bad. I mean, you actually lose your girlfriend, but now you might also lose your friend.

PS: I have a teenie-weenie small confession to make. :) I'm actually (almost) at the same boat with the girl in the scenario above (but promise, the scenario is not about me). The only difference is that I never confronted the guy, even until now. That's what I've learned from my experiences before. Never ask when you know there's no definite answer to your question.

PPS: To my girl friend (again, platonic) who's reading this. Yes, you are the girl I've been referring to! hehe. And I hope you've learned your lessons from your past experiences which are all the same (don't you think?). Please be wiser this time. Love you much! :*

PPPS: After so much deliberations and sighs, I don't hate the scenario that much anymore. But I won't change the title anymore (redundant. noticed it too).

PPPPS: I'm just adding another post-script so it won't be three like the last time.. haha. So okay, I'll end it here.

Jinxed

Scene 1 (Final interview in a call center):

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Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

Me: I'm a registered nurse. I graduated in *Insert name of school here* last 2007. I already worked in *Insert name of Middle East country here* for a year and I just came back January of this year.

Interviewer: So you don't have any call center experience?

Me: No.

Interviewer: Ok, so expect a call from us after a few days. Thank you so much for your time.

But I did not receive any call from them a few days or even weeks after that.

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Scene 2 (Applying as an online English tutor for Koreans. After completing a pronunctiation test via webcam interview, i.e., reading to the interviewer a lot of english paragraphs and dialogues with proper intonations):

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Interviewer: I'm sorry but we only accept people with online teaching experience.

Me: Ok. (But was actually pissed because why did they have to let me read all those paragraphs and dialogues when in fact, they should have read my resume first!)

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Scene 3 (After a month of taking a drawing exam in an animations company where I would like to work as a cartoonist)

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Me: (via phone) Hello, I took the drawing exam last September and I would like to know the status of my application.

Receptionist: Ok. I'll just transfer you to the HR department.

Me: (same dialogue as above)

HR staff: May I know your name please?

Me: Camille...

HR staff: (after a few minutes checking their files) I'm sorry but you weren't able to pass our exam.

Me: (Pause) Okay. Thank you. Bye.

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Am I really that bad not to have a decent job in my own country?

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Or should I just go back to where I've started my career? :(