This afternoon, my grandfather asked me to go upstairs to check out what he did in our terrace. He fixed our Christmas lights. Not only did he put on the lights but he also designed it in two giant wired circles with an angel between them. It's really nice but not as beautiful as the first time I've seen it.
On second thought, I've never actually laid eyes on this Christmas lights anymore like the way I used to when I was a child.
When I used to admire our big Christmas tree with lots of adornments decorated by my grandmother. She loves decorating our Christmas tree every year. Then my grandfather will put the musical Christmas lights around the tree and all of us will put our gifts underneath it. But since my grandmother was diagnosed with a heart disease about 5 years ago, and she easily gets tired nowadays, she doesn't put up our Christmas tree anymore.
At the age of 10, I remember myself still writing a letter to Santa asking him what I want for Christmas. And he never let me down. Whenever I wake up early morning of Christmas day, my present would always be under our Christmas tree or inside a "Santa's sock" outside the window pane. My family and I was already having a difficult year during that time because both of my parents lost their jobs. But nonetheless, I still have the Christmas spirit in me so I asked Santa for a Polly pocket as his Christmas gift for me. It was already 2:30 am of Christmas day when I was about to go to the bathroom to pee when I saw my mother doing something beside our Christmas tree. I tip-toed a bit just to look a little closer on what she was doing. She was wrapping a small box with a purple art paper. I was too sleepy and groggy at that time so I just quickly went to the bathroom and went back to bed. The next day, I saw that very same box already wrapped in purple art paper under the tree. I opened it since it has my name on it. A pink Polly pocket was inside it. That was the last time I believed in Santa Clause.
As I get older, we seldom spend Christmas time together. My father went abroad and so was the sister of my mother. Being an only daughter and grand daughter in our family, I only have 4 members of my family left here. We don't put up the Christmas tree anymore. No more decorations aside from the musical Christmas lights in our terrace which by the way, doesn't play any music now. We don't wait for 12 midnight anymore to spend Noche Buena. We just have it the next day as our lunch. No god-children coming into our house anymore.
It's just like any other day. Like our birthdays when we get old. We don't anticipate and celebrate it anymore as we used to when we were young.
Seeing those Christmas lights made me wonder, when will be the next time my family and I will celebrate Christmas together again.
4 comments:
you tend to get cynical as you gel older, i guess. christmas is usually just for children.
ngak, *get* pala ibig kong sabihin dun. hehe
buti kapa nga naranasan mong gawin syo ng parents mo ung pagpapanggap na may santa claus talaga, ako khit nung bata ako hindi ako naniwala kay santa kaya ndi ko na sinubukan pang humiling.. hahaha! hindi ko na rin kc maalala kung kelan ung huling beses na ngkasama-sama kmi sa xmas at new yr. ksi bata palang ako nasa abroad na tatay ko :-/
@Emz: that's the sad part of growing up. :(
@charee: ang lungkot lang noh kapatid. kagaya nga ng sabi ko sau dati sa ym, kung maayos lang sana ekonomiya natin dito e bakit pa kakailanganin magtrabaho sa ibang bansa. e kaso ganun e. that's reality.. haaaayyy
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